Do you know who I am?

There can't be many levels of embarassment and self-pity below where I sank yesterday.

I went to renew my 10 year passport at the Post Office; they do this "check and send" service, where you get the application form checked for you and a guaranteed two-week turn around. I got myself some nice new pictures taken and queued like a good man. I stepped up to the counter and presented my documents; one valid passport as ID, one application form and one set of new pictures. Whilst the counter staff are whizzing away on my application I switch-off.

BEFORE

"Excuse me, but you haven't had these counter-signed", says the man. He's referring to the new photos of my, which don't need to be counter-signed for a renewal if the existing passport is valid still. "But I don't need to because this is a renewal", I reply. "That's true, but not if your appearance has altered significantly from 10 years ago."

"What do you mean?", I ask. "Well you've put on a bit of weight and I don't believe that you bear any resemblance to the passport photo." Oh, excellent. In public I have been told that I'm fat and that my passport application won't be processed. I calmed myself slightly and responded with, "I don't have them counter-signed and I want to apply. And anyway, how come no one in the US, Canada, New Zealand, China and most of Europe hasn't said this to me as I cross their borders?"

AFTER

Anyway, to cut a long story short, he agrees to put the application through, but says it may be returned, I may lose my application fee and he can't guarantee the two-week turn around. Basically all the reasons I used the Post Office have gone, but I'm there, need the passport for work and so I go through with it. Watch this space. I can't believe anyone would think a bit of fat changed your appearance.